Philosophy of life... by tgchan

Journal

Wow...I would never say I will start my own blog...WTF -_-'

Anyways I'll treat it like my life journal so I can remember how f*cked up life I was leading (hopefully I will be more happy in future...)


For those who read my journal: as you have noticed (or not) I am adding some youtube music clips. Basically this is the music I am listening to while writing the new posts. This is the music I love, this is the music which helps me write everything straight from my mind/heart.

view:  full / summary

wow...

Posted by tgchan on July 2, 2012 at 1:30 PM Comments comments (0)

wow...

Finally after a year I have gathered enough motivation and will to update this site and add some new content... I hope you will enjoy it!


Being lazy is really exhausting... :D

what's next?

Posted by tgchan on June 10, 2011 at 7:43 PM Comments comments (0)

Since December 26, 2006 my life has changed...


Finally I had a goal in life and the confidence in what I am doing...


After all these years I am forced to semi-retire from my gaming career which has never really started...


Due to lack of any gaming success(no proper people to play with/no team/no personal achievements) I am all b...

Read Full Post »

thx all for nice feedback

Posted by tgchan on May 9, 2011 at 1:20 PM Comments comments (0)

Thank you all for some nice words and appreciation.


Unfortunately I have stopped updating my site some time ago. I am thinking of coming back, maybe some youtube channel or something but it will consume lots of my time which I spend currently for gaming :/ so I am not sure yet.

Anyways I am still here, still not sure where I am heading... ;)


Read Full Post »

coma

Posted by tgchan on January 13, 2011 at 8:49 PM Comments comments (0)

I have lost motivation to write new things here. Nobody give a shit anyways.


I have quit CS:S and moved to CS. Formed the team of people with whom I can play a lot.

Am I happy now? No. I wake up only to wait for training so I can play with team; problems, problems and problems... always something on my way. I have lost job (not because of me) and now I have to l...

Read Full Post »

loop till you puke

Posted by tgchan on October 19, 2010 at 3:27 PM Comments comments (0)

Long time since I have updated my journal...


First of all I would like to say sorry to all people I have hurt recently, especially guys from steam.



Sometimes I just can't stand reality so much I have to " turn myself off ", be alone etc.

I hate wh...

Read Full Post »

Obsessive?compulsive disorder

Posted by tgchan on September 13, 2010 at 2:47 PM Comments comments (0)

Obsessive–compulsive disorder... + a lil bit of mysophobia.


This is what I got (for sure)...and many more I bet lol


Few weeks ago I was watching again " Matchstick Men " movie, it is really great.


Read Full Post »

IQ?

Posted by tgchan on August 16, 2010 at 8:54 AM Comments comments (0)

I feel that I am extremely  intelligent...


I can read people like an open book,

I can see angles nobody else can see,

I can adjust to every situation immediately,

I can get into someones mind and know how they feel, what they think,

I can foresee react...

Read Full Post »

back to css or css came back to me?

Posted by tgchan on August 5, 2010 at 6:17 PM Comments comments (0)

I am back to css again. It is not the same comeback as in the past. I just play some dm and 2vs2 on esl with my friend. Nothing serious, no more any dreams involved...


I am sh1t and I want be better and better, get good team and do as much as I can but it is not like in old times anymore... I don't play dm for hours, I don't force myself to play sh1t mixes just to get better...


Read Full Post »

losing

Posted by tgchan on August 1, 2010 at 9:27 AM Comments comments (0)

I am losing it all the way now...

I can't even say what is wrong but I can feel it... I can feel that I am totally dead.


Is it because I gave up on my dream ? Is it because wherever I go I can't find the place for myself ? Why do I see everything in black now ?


Omfg what the fuck is happ...

Read Full Post »

emptiness

Posted by tgchan on July 28, 2010 at 11:01 AM Comments comments (0)

I really miss a good friend. The friend with who I could play same game, share fun, talk about random things etc. just a normal stuff I guess...


I felt really ok for few past days; I really enjoyed the gaming etc. but yesterday around 3am something has changed... so suddenly it almost felt liek punch.


I think I can't...

Read Full Post »

extreme gaming in extreme temperatures...

Posted by tgchan on July 17, 2010 at 6:07 AM Comments comments (0)

It is so fcking hot that I am sweating my ass off just sitting around... that is bad for gaming... I'm telling you...


Today I will level up to 80lv with my rogue ( took me exactly 31days without being exping wh0re. I just enjoyed the game )


Read Full Post »

wow

Posted by tgchan on June 29, 2010 at 10:14 PM Comments comments (0)

(It is 4:26am)


Because of the WoW servrer maintenance I wasn't able to play but I have watched another incredible fcking great movie instead.


A movie which is a pure art. The movie that will twist your brain and force to think about your existence and many other things...

Read Full Post »

holidays

Posted by tgchan on June 28, 2010 at 9:16 AM Comments comments (0)

So finally I got what I wanted... This is how my day looks now:


- I wake up around 1 pm

- I make 50 push ups then 66 sit ups

- hoover my room/ mouse pad, keyboard etc. (one of my psychological problem)

- play on guitar for couple of minutes (I wasted money for it so I have to play on it for at least few minutes eve...

Read Full Post »

wow>css

Posted by tgchan on June 21, 2010 at 1:18 PM Comments comments (0)

Few days ago my brother bought me a WoW pack. I would never buy/play this game but since it was a b-day gift I had to give it a try...


I was always againts wow;

- too complicated

- you have to pay monthly for it

- too much stuff to learn

- game for noob...

Read Full Post »

existence

Posted by tgchan on June 6, 2010 at 3:53 PM Comments comments (0)

Depression is eating me alive.

Sometimes I have to go to sleep just to stop thinking because I feel like my head will explode.


I can't find place for myself...

..is there any...?


I have so much free time, I have so much dedication and discipline in mys...

Read Full Post »

search

Posted by tgchan on May 28, 2010 at 5:36 PM Comments comments (0)

And I am messing with my settings again...

My team is barely active... All I do is aim/dm servers all the time...


Small crosshair is really not my thing... I was barely making 2/1 KPD most of the time with it.

Still looking for the settings which will makes me feel confident during the game. So far LARGE is doing pretty good....

Read Full Post »

new design

Posted by tgchan on May 27, 2010 at 10:20 AM Comments comments (0)

I was damn tired of the old site, I had to change it. I hope you liek it. There is also a new page called "Ask me" go check it out for more info.


Still playing & still dreaming about big things ^^, nothing really interesting going on atm.

back again

Posted by tgchan on May 15, 2010 at 7:44 AM Comments comments (0)

Being without a team sucks so much... I really don't wanna feel that again...


Few days ago my friend asked me if I don't wanan play with them again (team unified), I have answered YES without any doubt.


Before my friend's offer I was hopping to play with some UK team but it looks liek they don't give a shit about me anymo...

Read Full Post »

being no one

Posted by tgchan on May 10, 2010 at 7:13 AM Comments comments (0)

Being no one is more exhausting than I thought...


Everything looks pointless, I don't wanna wake up because I know there is nothing waiting for me out there...

I look at people, their photos, their life... I feel like I am falling deeper and deeper...


Read Full Post »

long hard road out of hell

Posted by tgchan on May 7, 2010 at 2:04 PM Comments comments (0)

I am so fucking pissed I can barely control myself...



Last weekend when I was playing cs:s I let my anger go of few times, I yelled so loud I have damaged my vocal cords or something... My voice has been changed for almost 6 days and I could barely speak because of sore throat. I still have a cough...


Read Full Post »

Rss_feed